The Thing About Old Age
Here are a few painful things that remind me I am no longer the stud I used to be:
1. The songs I grew up listening to in the 80s are now classifiedas "Golden Oldies"
2. The cute waitress I have been eyeing starts calling me "Pak Cik".
3. I am standing in a crowded bus or LRT, and a young lady offersto give up her seat for me.
4. The only oral sex I get is when that babe I've been checking outall night walks over and says, "F*ck you!"
5. After I stop jumping, there are parts of my body that go onwobbling for quite some time.
6. I can't remember what my d**k looks like anymore becausewhenever I look down, all I can see is my protruding belly.
7. The sweet 19-year old girl who has been coyly smiling at me forthe past 5 minutes finally works up enough courage and asks, "Pak Cik,you are Minah's dad, aren't you?"
8. I put on boxer-shorts and it looks as if I am wearing briefs.
I can go on. But there is only so much pain a man can take. However, I take consolation in a quotation I once read that goes, "Old age andtreachery will always overcome youth and skill".
So, all you 40-something guys out there, take heart: It ain't overtill its over!